Losing my BFF - 9th May 2021

Losing my BFF - 9th May 2021

I don't know what to write, but still, I am writing. Vedika... She's an amazing person, she is my first friend(girl), my favorite person, a special person and much more which I can't explain.


We met on 16th April 2020 just by dare, she replied to my story, and here we are "Best Friends Forever".


But that's not true now I can't even feel that she is my BFF, because previously she was way different from now, she used to care about me, she used to do many mischievous things with me, she used to interfere in everything and she used to make me laugh, make me feel happy and special.


But now that's not the case, now she's completely changed... rarely she do the above things now... I don't know why she changed... maybe I am too much interfering in her life. Maybe she doesn't want our bond to remain like this.

Maybe I hurt her, or maybe she's irritated with me. I don't know. I just don't know what happened to her.


I am always available for her anytime she wants. And when I need her, she was not there for me every time. I know she must be busy but the way she treats me is very hurtful and I can't resist this... I do cry for her a lotttt.


Now I am covid positive and really this illness is mentally dangerous too. As this situation is worst. And I feel very low sometimes... And I really wanted her to be with me, spend time with me so that I can feel good and happy. 


But, she was not there with me... in fact, I got very much hurt... I was like waiting for her whole time, just to spend some time and feel good.. but that's never happened.


I know she's involved in the marriage of her cousin sister, but she's at home she can take time for her brother, but not for me... That also hurt me a lot...


Previously I told her that please give me importance, time but still no changes...


Usually, it's okay I can control it, but now I am ill... I needed her the most and she was not there. 


So now I decided I will not reply to her, I will not wait for her, I will not be that available for her when I was used to be.


When I will leave na then she will understand how much I cared for her, how much I gave importance to her, and how she hurt me.


I don't know how many days/hours I can resist. And I know at the end I am going to reply here and I will again hurt myself.


Let's see...

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